The Consuming Darkness
by Shadowsign
Summary: In a moment of extreme regret, a young Severus Snape rewinds time and kills himself as a child, creating a new world where things turned out very differently. Forced to watch over this new world, he realises just how important he truly is... On hiatus. :


_**The Consuming Darkness**_

**Challenge: **The Non-Existent Challenge, set by 'Someone aka me'. (ACTUAL CHALLENGE, not a joke)

**Summary: **In a moment of extreme regret, a young Severus Snape rewinds time and kills himself as a child, creating a new world where things turned out very differently. Forced to watch as the new world begins to unravel, Severus finds himself given a choice: Right his wrong and live a life of suffering, or pass on to the beyond and leave the world to it's fate?

**- **Shadowsign: Challenge **-**

Broken. His heart was broken, ripped to shreds, almost obliterated. He had only ever saved it for one, and without her his life seemed meaningless, cold and empty-as empty as her eyes the day she destroyed him. Without her, he had no reason to live. And yet, he kept on living…He smiled, joked with his friends, some said it was an improvement. Indeed, outwardly Severus Snape was happier than ever before, more confident, more dedicated. Inwardly, he was empty.

_Several years later_

He should have killed himself that day. Part of him had died, the better part, and without it what reason had he to keep on living? What reason did he have to get out of bed? For had he not killed the one person he had ever loved? Of course, the Dark Lord had wielded that blade, but Severus had been its guide. When Lily had rejected him, he had suppressed his emotions in order to keep on living, in order to keep on going on. Now she was dead (and without her, the sky seemed just a little darker), those emotions returned-and they were tearing him apart. Hand shaking, he raised his ebony wand to his temple-_he could end it now, it would be so easy, so just, no more than what he deserved_-and prepared to cast the curse that would send him to the beyond.

"Avada Ke-"He stopped abruptly, unable to finish the curse.

He couldn't do it, he was too weak. Just as he had been too weak to save Lily, too weak to fight the Marauders, too weak to see right from wrong. And besides, what would killing himself achieve in the greater scheme of things? **Nothing**. Was that not what Dumbledore had told him? And, as always, the old man was right. Killing himself now wouldn't right his wrongs, wouldn't bring Lily back-but killing himself as a child just might make all the difference in the world.

_Three days later_

The Time Turner was his. Rookwood had been able to obtain one for him-he remembered the conversation vividly.

"_Severus, if you can save him, we will be honoured above all others!"_

"_I am aware of that, Augustus."_

"_Good luck, my friend. You'll need it…"_

And so the fool had played into Severus' hands. Severus didn't care about the Dark Lord anymore-he couldn't care less about the Death Eaters. All he cared about was redemption. And so he turned time, over and over, travelling further than anyone had ever travelled before, twenty years into the past…

_Rewind_

He landed just where he had left, in a small, dilapidated park by Spinners End. He was about six months old here, his parents were living in relative happiness-it had been Severus' accidental magic as a toddler that had forced Eileen to reveal the truth about her heritage, it had been Severus who had driven his father to drink-Severus could no longer blame Tobias for his faults, for even as a child Severus had been a herald of tragedy, it appeared. If Severus could sever the knot now, end his own life at the root, things would be better for all involved…

He knocked at their house, surprised at the neatness of the garden, the polish on the door- this house had been proud once, before Severus destroyed it. The door was answered quickly, by a smiling woman with sparkling brown eyes.

"Hello? I'm Sev-Steven Snape. Tobias' cousin. Is he in?" Severus blurted, hoping desperately that Tobias was at work, as he should be.

"Steven? No, I'm afraid Toby's at the mill. How are you, I haven't seen you in years?" Eileen inquired, smiling pleasantly. Severus was taken aback-this woman couldn't be his _mother_!

"Err…I'm fine. Just a little busy at the moment. Tell Tobias I called by, alright?" Severus turned as if to leave, expecting to be stopped. He wasn't disappointed.

"Come in, I insist! Do you want some tea?"

After some half-hearted arguing, Severus stepped inside his old home. As he entered, he was once again struck by how fresh, how _new_, everything seemed to be. Deciding that Eileen really didn't need to see what he was about to do-even if he did Obliviate her after the deed was done-he surreptitiously cast a Disillusionment spell on himself, then walked stealthily towards the room he knew to be his. Ignoring the confused cries of his mother echoing up the stairs, he kicked open the door to his room and raised his wand. He felt oddly hollow, standing over his own sleeping form. So _young_…But this was necessary. Severus wondered if Voldemort had felt like this, towering over Lily's son, this strange feeling of regret and shame, mixed with boiling hatred and steely determination.

"_AVADA KEDAVRA_!"

**End Chapter I**

Notes: This will be a three part story. Thanks for reading, if you liked this you may want to check out my other story, _The Rift_. (Shameless self-plugging, I know) The next two chapters will be longer than this one, I doubt I will make it end up an AU but if enough people ask me to...As always reviews are very much appreciated. : )


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